Conservapedia - User contributions [en]

Henny Youngman

2009-03-08T05:19:33Z

JWalterDavis:

'''Henny Youngman''' (1906 – 1998) was an [[American]] [[comedian]] and violinist. Youngman's wife was often the butt of his jokes. His anti-family position is thus explained by his liberalism. His attacks towards his wife sullied a whole generation of Americans.

::::::: ''"Take my wife, please".''
::: ''"I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back."''

== External links ==

*[http://www.google.com.mx/search?q=Henny+Youngman&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=com.google:es-ES:official&client=firefox-a Henny Youngman Jokes]
*[http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Henny_Youngman/ Quotations]

[[Category:Entertainment]]

Ivan IV

2009-03-08T05:18:42Z

JWalterDavis:

'''Ivan IV''' was the first [[czar]] of Russia, he was called "the terrible". He reigned from 1533 to 1547 and executed many innocent people. He was a notorious atheist, which further proves the correlation between [[Atheism and Mass Murder]]. Ivan was succeeded by his son, [[Feodor]].

[[category:Czars]]

Calvary Chapel

2009-03-08T05:17:24Z

JWalterDavis:

{{title|align=left|HIPPIES}}

{{q|Free Sex and Drugs or Vietnam. Which would you have picked?|Old Hippie Dude|hippies}}

[[Image:Earth_tranny.png|thumb|right|300px|The common hippie. Hippies are extremely dangerous to humans and should only be approached when packing [[Ronald Reagan|ultra-conservatism]].]]

==Hippies, man!==
Like, '''hippies''' (''homo groovius'') are a semisentient subspecies of [[human]]ity that first devolved in the late 1960s and are now mostly extinct, man. The result of experimental drug testing on just about everything, hippies like, transformed the face of the United States and Great Britain and certain parts of Australia too, man. The hippie race was distinguished by their outtasite vibes, psychedelic [[drugs]], [[bad|interesting]] odors, radically long hair, and above all, the tendency to "[[the man|fight the power]]." Hippies were extremely active in both [[politics]] and [[sex]], and often confused the two. In fact, [[liberal|liberal tendencies]] and [[sex|fornication]] are now thought of as the reason for overpopulation in the world today. But that's cool, man!

===Black hippies, brotha!===
[[Image:Hippie-black.gif|left|thumb|Black hippies had ''soul,'' ma brotha. They had the ''grooove.'' Outtasite!]]
Brotha, black hippies are a subspecies of the hippie subspecies, making them a subsubspecies, you dig? Black hippies differ from [[oxymoron|conventional hippies]] in that they got ''style''. Black hippies were noticeably [[niggers|blacker]], wore more [[bling]], and were more likely to not work for [[the man]] every night and day like other white fool hippies. Black hippies were always angrier than other hippies because of their righteous enragement at their lack of rights, man. Most black hippies also belonged to a secret society like the [[Black Panthers]] or the Nation of Islam. Fo' shizzle.

==Groovy sounds, man!==
Like, most hippies didn't know they were hippies until some one told them in a song, man. It started when Allen Ginsberg, Maharishi, [[Bob Dylan]], Ira Ram Dass, ABBA, and, like, the sultans of cool, [[The Doors]], all started listening to ancient water bong rhythms AND three different holy gurus rant about the Thardo Bodal - The Tibetan Book of Like, Wow! which was instant enlightenment through sacred [[LSD]] ingestion OR smoking the dried skin of [[Sahara]] bananas... at the same time! The catch was it all leads to NOthingness - if you can dig that. This message of "Make Love Not War in the Void" was propounded by such psych bands as [[Jefferson Starship]], [[The Misunderstood]], as well as smaller, unknown bands like the [[Beatles]] (Transgenders, man. Rebels!). We're talking, like, [[weed|psychedelic]] music here. Catch my drift? If you can't SEE your music then you’re not listening to a psychedelic hippie tune. Like, in 1969, scientists from everywhere went near [[Woodstock]] to watch a truckload of hippies just totally funk out, man. There were groovy rhythms by hippie bands like [[The Who]] that drove thousands of hippies into a [[sex|mating frenzy]]... man. I know ''I'' had fun.
 
 

==Trippin' drugs, man. Whoa...==
[[Image:B23.land of psychedelic illluminations.jpg|thumb|300px|When hippies use drugs, they are transported to a mystical land full of pretty colors and psychedelicosity. Just look at those purty colors, man. Whoa...]]
Like, drugs, dude. DRUGS! Drugs were awesome. Hippies used drugs to attain [[Nirvana]], which is like, totally freakin' awesome! Hippies got all the [[weed]], [[pot]], [[bongs]], [[meth]], [[heroin]], [[AIDS]], and deep fried [[banana]] peels from mystical lands of enchantment like [[Columbia]] and [[China]]. Like, hippies loved the government's "Make America Safe for Drugs" program in 1963-67. The drugs were so popular with hippies because of all the kaleidescope colors that they saw. Like, hippies will do anything to just watch psychedelic colors, man. ''Anything''. 'Cause the colors are so pretty, and.... whoa... Anyway, when hippies shoot up, or light a joint, or snort the magic snow, their [[vodka|spirits]] are sent to the Mystical Land of All Things Trippin'. Hippies love this wonderful place so much, they never want to go, man. It's just so particularly excellent. You wouldn't want to leave either.

==Free love!==
Like, hippies reproduced constantly, any place<ref>Doing it swinging from lampposts was especially popular.</ref>, any time, any one, man. For [[me|ugly people]], it was an amazing time. The courting process was very simple, one only had to say, "come on baby, light my [[fire]]" and you were ''goin'.'' However, for that extra advantage, hippies often refrained from showering for years at a time, which created a distinct body odor that tended to attract female hippies intent on producing mini hippie babies. Some lady hippies have said (those capable of coherent speech, of course) that the smell somewhat resembles the smell of the inside of a sweaty [[Volkswagen]] van, and is therefore impossible to resist. Like, other hippies say that the intoxicating mix of human stench, pot smoke, and a ritualistically applied patchouli oil creates a natural hippie pheromone that's like cosmic moonbeams and sunshine rainbows and purple gypsies... you know what I mean, dude, man...? The complete and total free love, man, had several setbacks that ultimately caused the total downfall of hippies in the '80s, [[AIDS]] and [[you]]. Both diseases slowly but surely killed off thousands of hippies in the '80s, and remains a major cause as to why you are so messed up.

==Peace out, man! Fight the power!==
Like, a lot of "religious people" say that hippies are total atheists, but that's not true, man. Hippies worship the Hippie Bible, which features commandments such as "Love thy nectar" and "Thou shalt not bathe." Every hippie dutifully follows every commandment in the Hippie Bible. A major part of this religion involves interrupting actual hard-working people<ref>Pansies...</ref> in an act they call "protesting." As hippies are more in tune to unjust human suffering, they usually protest more than normal humans. Hippies picked up a variety of different issues to yell at people about, like the Vietnam War, saving the trees, helping the environment, the Vietnam War, abortion, world peace, along with more specialized issues like black power, the women's liberation movement<ref>The Beatles were very involved in this particular movement, and often burned their bras several times a day in front of Capitol Hill.</ref>, and the Vietnam War. Each hippie had his or her own pet protest, man. Hippies often chanted prayers during their protest/worship service. The most famous of these invocations went "Hey, hey, LBJ, how many kids didja kill today?" The wide variety of protests that hippies chose from was comparable to Protestant sects and denominations, dude, man.

==Decline and Fall of the Hippies, man...==
Like, in the 1982's the hippie population was brought to the brink of extinction due to changes in the environment, man. Number one, rampant neoconservatism caused a multi-fold decrease in retardation, chill vibes, and mouchebaggery, the three main food sources hippies. This happened at the same time as a massive increase in the common hippie's two main predators, AIDS and reality. Reality especially had a heavy toll on hippies. Like, reality is a fearsome predator and merciless hunter of hippies, and is well equipped to do so, with basic reasoning skills as much as twice as long as any other predator, as well as a thick coat of dignity which absorbs both consciousness and social justice, which are hallucinogenic compounds secreted by hippies for self defense... man. Despite the creation of federally managed hippie reserves such as San Fransisco, Boulder, and Seattle, the common hippie still faces threats from environmental toxins such as self respect. Those hippies who did survive to the modern era were forced to get jobs because they finally realized that you don't get paid to be high all the time. These "hippies in disguise" can now be found holding public office, wearing suits and ties. They are very upset that their new world order of hippies did not come to be, and now seek revenge by passing laws that prevent us from breathing, as the carbon dioxide will nuke the ozone layer. These hippies can often be identified by their bumper-sticker encrusted Prius and their tendency to start vomiting on everything if one of their ideals is challenged. And, like, dude, in recent years, people started to pay even more attention to the plight of the hippie due to media coverage of totally humane programs to crossbreed hippies with the northern white trash methhead (''Michiganus druggius'') to produce a hybrid known as "ravers" or "club kids". So far their offspring have been infertile, man. Unfortunately, we may have to resign ourselves to the fact that the only hippies your children will know will be in zoos................ man.

== See Also, Man. ==
[[Image:Jimi psychedelic.jpg|thumb|There's really no reason for Jimi to be here, he just looks crazy cool, man.]]
*[[Sex]]
*[[Drugs]]
*[[Rock and roll]]
*[[Beatles]]
*[[Vietnam]]
*[[Old hippie chick who's always collecting money]]

==References.............. Man.==
<references/>
{{Race}}

{{FA|date=4 July 2008|revision=3154377}}

[[Category: Ethnicities]]
[[Category: Occupations]]
[[Category: Things that make Baby Jesus cry]]
[[Category:Things George Bush doesn't know about]]
[[Category:Potheads]]
[[Category:Articles about a person written in the style of that person]]

[[cs:Hippies]]
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[[pl:Hippisi]]
[[pt:Hippie]]
[[ru:Хиппи]]

Segregation

2009-03-08T05:15:53Z

JWalterDavis:

'''Segregation''' means to separate groups of people based on race by government mandate. In the [[United States]], the policy was created and enforced by the [[Democratic Party]] starting in the 1870s. Segregation was allowed in public schools by the [[U.S. Supreme Court]] in [[Plessy v. Ferguson]] (1896), but then prohibited in [[Brown v. Board of Education]] (1954).

In addition to the public schools, segregation existed in the United States in the military and in public accommodations like trains, buses, restaurants, movie theatres and hotels before being banned everywhere except in private clubs by federal law in the Ciivil Rights Act of 1964.

This practice is supported by Leviticus 12-10, which of course, causes Liberals to denounce it.

==See Also==
* [[Jim Crow]], for a history in the U.S.
* [[Separate_Development#Apartheid_in_South_Africa|Apartheid]]

[[Category:United States History]]
[[Category:Ethics]]
[[Category:Civil Rights]]

Segregation

2009-03-08T05:15:20Z

JWalterDavis:

'''Segregation''' means to separate groups of people based on race by government mandate. In the [[United States]], the policy was created and enforced by the [[Democratic Party]] starting in the 1870s. Segregation was allowed in public schools by the [[U.S. Supreme Court]] in [[Plessy v. Ferguson]] (1896), but then prohibited in [[Brown v. Board of Education]] (1954).

In addition to the public schools, segregation existed in the United States in the military and in public accommodations like trains, buses, restaurants, movie theatres and hotels before being banned everywhere except in private clubs by federal law in the Ciivil Rights Act of 1964.

==See Also==
* [[Jim Crow]], for a history in the U.S.
* [[Separate_Development#Apartheid_in_South_Africa|Apartheid]]

[[Category:United States History]]
[[Category:Ethics]]
[[Category:Civil Rights]]

Mirabeau

2009-03-08T05:14:46Z

JWalterDavis:

'''Mirabeau''' (1749 - 1791) was a key figure in the [[French Revolution]]. He was a noble, who attended military school and was supplied with wealth from his parents. A notorious spendthrift with a temperamental character and despite being a count, he was elected to the [[Estates-Generale]] as a member of the [[Third Estate]].

Having supported the revolution, he despaired of the agitation he unleashed. In the spring of 1790, he later came to be secretly in the pay of King [[Louis XVI]] and hoped to reconile the [[monarchy]] with the Revolution.

He was a notorious Atheist which accounts for his alignment with King [[Louis XVII]].

He died in 1791 due to poor health and a long history of [[Athiesm]].

[[category:French People]]
[[category:French Revolution]]

Sex change operation

2009-03-08T05:11:06Z

JWalterDavis: Removed grafitti.

'''Sexual Reassignment''' entails removing (or creating) an approximation of the genitals of the opposite sex. This is considered a sin to God, according to Leviticus 11-16. In Islamic Iran, sex change operations are allowed.

Some of the people who pursue this surgery are from the following categories of gender-confused individuals:
* Crossdressers: Previously known as "[[transvestite]]s", members of this group of individuals are content with their birth gender, but choose to dress up as and use the mannerisms of the opposite gender.
* Drag performers: Drag performers, the male half of which is sometimes referred to as "drag queens," are individuals who dress up as and use the mannerisms of the opposite sex for the purpose of entertaining an audience.
* Transsexuals: Individuals belonging in this group were born into one gender but identify emotionally and psychologically with the other.
* Intersexed: An intersexed person is someone who was born with ambiguous genitalia, so doctors assigned him/her a specific gender at birth. Sometimes this assignment doesn't correlate with the biological XX or XY gender. These children are socialized as a certain gender, but as they grow older, they might not necessarily identify as they were assigned and would want to switch to the opposite gender.
==See also==
[[sex change]]

[[Category:Sexuality]]